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SYNOPSIS
Confessions of a Turtle Wife
© 2001 Anita Salzberg
CONTENTS
I. WHAT AM I GETTING INTO?
- Getting Under the Shell During a visit to the Bronx Zoo, my husband, Allen, learns about the New York Turtle and Tortoise Society. He becomes their adoption chairperson. I worry that well be inundated with turtles.
- Turtle Central Our apartment becomes a clearing house for every unwanted turtle in New York City. Turtle people stop Allen on the street to talk turtle.
- Love At First Sight Allen recalls the moment he realized he was in love with me; I learn about the time he pulled a painted turtle out of a stream at camp at age 11, and fell in love with turtles.
- A Box Turtle in the City Allen helps an injured box turtle. He names her Max. She becomes his favorite turtle. She walks around the house and lays eggs.
- Living Quarters We see Allens friends turtle habitats (a.k.a. turtle Taj Mahals); Allen gets his own turtle habitat.
- A Lot of Turtles We visit a turtle enthusiast who has over 1,000 turtles.
- Say Cheese We photograph Allens turtles, who refuse to pose. I start to observe them more closely.
II. IM AMBIVALENT
- Perfect Places to Find Turtles We look for turtles in the wild, but find few. Allen visits (almost) every pet shop in America with turtles. When I learn how turtles are shipped in the pet trade, Im glad Allens helping to save them.
- We Take a Trip We travel to Florida to observe a sea turtle conservation project. I like these turtles more than I expect to.
- Why You Should Never Leave Your Turtle Home Alone Trouble finding turtle sitters.
- Turtle People Do the Darndest Things The Turtle Roundup at the Turtle Back Zoo; the Turtle Show in Manhattan; I find some people we meet to be as weird (they put ribbons around their turtles, carry around big turtles in their arms) as people find Allen to be.
- A Few More Annoying Things About Living With Turtles Turtle water (water teaming with Salmonella germs); turtle-related entertainment; the ultimate turtle hazard — Max!
- On the Pot With a Snapping Turtle a 25-lb. snapper takes over our bathtub for two weeks.
- Not in My Bathtub, You Dont! I refuse to let 3,000+ hatchling turtles confiscated from Manhattan street peddlers take up residence in our tub. Allen asks me to help him ship the turtles to an animal rehabilitator in Texas.
- Real Turtles Dont Eat Pizza Turtle foods and turtles as food.
- Is There a Turtle Doctor in the House? I admire Allens dedication to keeping his turtles healthy. Allen loses a turtle to old age and I console him.
- Sex and the Single Turtle People ask Allen how to tell boy turtles from girl turtles; we watch turtles mate.
- Star Turn With Turtles In 1990, Allens press release about how Ninja Turtles are creating dangers for real turtles — parents are buying children turtles without learning correct care — gets him onto network and cable TV; I sit home and watch. Max lays an egg (off camera) on the Bide-a-Wee Pet Show.
III. BECOMING A CONVERT
- Why I Learned Latin To prepare to attend a turtle conference in Westchester County, I learn turtles Latin (scientific) names.
- They Paved Paradise — At the turtle conference, Im distressed to learn the extent to which turtles are in trouble.
- Close Encounters of the Chelonian Kind I ask conference attendees why they fell for turtles; Im touched by their answers.
- At Long Last Leatherbacks We observe a sea turtle conservation project on St. Croix. I find my favorite turtle.
- A Turtle to Call My Own I get a juvenile leopard tortoise. Im sad, knowing Ill have to give it away when it gets big (60 lbs.).
IV APPENDIX
Resources:
- Five Things You Can Do to Help Turtles
- More Information on Helping Turtles
- So You Think You Want a Pet Turtle
- How to Choose a Healthy Pet Turtle
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